Wednesday, March 05, 2003

New psycotherapy approach

I met with my therapist yesterday and had a good session. We're going to focus on one issue using two approaches simultaneously for the next month. One approach is a pop-psychology approach (he's normally not fond of pop psychology but thinks it will work in my case) where I learn some self parenting techniques using an inner-child approach that's popularized in John Bradshaw's books, to work on my inner demons and sense of self love. The other approach is a cognitive-behavioral approach in which I work on my hygiene and eating habits/phobias. For the short term we made a goal for one month to get me on a schedule where I actually eat 3 meals a day, even if it's junk food or whatever, just so I can get used to feeding myself since I've normally only been feeding myself once a day. Also, to get me to take a shower every day when my cousin is at home in the late afternoon and I'm at the peak of my medicine so the anxiety about that won't be so great. It's all baby-step approaches, but I believe in the baby step approach. The long-term goal of both of these approaches is to get me to actually want to eat right and take care of myself not because I have to, but because I feel it's right to do so. All this makes me feel wonderful that I can work on a baby-step approach, because in the past when I entered into recovery I wanted it all and I wanted it right away and I tried to change things too fast and too many things at once and it ended with me being worse in the long run, although I learned a lot about myself by doing that. I'm glad I'm going to a good clinic with good practitioners. I even signed up for a group therapy session that one of the doctors at the clinic is putting on, since CoDA no longer has any groups in my area.

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